On an overnight bike trip I was planning with my son in the California wine country, I was so excited and so wanted him to have a good experience that I decided to splurge on a nice hotel as a reward for his rigorous cycling. What was a little extra money for a bit of luxury?
I remembered a hotel right on the square of the town that was our destination. I found the phone number and dialed. My credit card was at the ready. Even though my conditioning (since childhood) is to economize, this was one time I felt like letting go.
Trapped in Scarcity
When Monique, the reservations agent, answered, she began to describe the room. I interrupted her. “I don’t need convincing. I’m ready to book it.” “Very good, Mr. Sherman, I have you down for one night, arriving Saturday, departing Sunday. Our deluxe room’s special rate is $675.”
I stopped breathing.
“I’m poor! Despite being wealthier than most Americans and most people in the world, there are just some stratospheres of wealth that I can’t reach. Instead of feeling wealthy and free, I’m suddenly trapped in scarcity. I really don’t have enough!”
Monique was still there. “I also have a standard room for $525,” she offered.
Before I hung up I said, “Thank you, Monique. I think I’ll be happier at the Best Western.”
Wealth Is More Than How Much Money You Have
As I hung up the phone, I felt a range of feelings: disappointment, shame, relief. I also had the sudden awareness that my wealth is in being with my son, my enjoyment of the outdoors, the exhilaration of biking, and the ability to take time away from work and other responsibilities. That is the true measure of my wealth, not whether I can afford a hotel room for $675.
What I am learning from my clients and friends is that wealth comes from our own definition of our inner values. Wealth is not about being able to afford the hotel (or house or car or tech gadget). Thank you to Monique for reminding me of my true wealth, which is independent of how much money I have.
